« une vision simple et authenthique
une personnalité riche et attachante…
du tourment mais aussi de la sérénité
les paradoxes de la vie dans une seule personne »
Well first things first, it’s none of my big talents to talk very much about myself. So this about me, is quite a challenge 😉 and then I think of
The magic begins where the comfort zone ends …
This writing has been a process, as all changes and challenges that we meet on our way.
I put, on the end of the text, the video of « Nothing else matters » by Metallica ( even if your ears don’t appreciate heavy metal, this song might talk to them – it’s a ballad) as there are quite some lines of text that speak to me like:
Life is ours, we live it our way ( a line of the song)
Then what has a song and music in general, in common with Shiatsu ?
Singing is one of the most ancient expressions of joy of humans, yes you can also express other emotions in a song 😉 – Sorry for not getting further into this now, I will make a different post about music, songs and Shiatsu.
This website here for ~Shiatsu for you~, is my adpatation of « Life is ours, we live it our way. » The deep driving force for me to dare make those steps ie writing this about Me and knowing I will push the publish button later … and this will be visible to all of the internet – *Greeting from Ego 😉 . . no my primary intention is not become an internet star , but to follow my own star (see Barbara Berkhan) or put in a quote (Yes, they are quite handy …):
Be yourself no matter what they say (a line in the text of « An Englishman in NewYork » by Sting).
As i have also a strong analytical mind, as well as an inner critic / judge who can be very « truth / is this right? » oriented or when Ego speaks up « Who are you to see yourself / claim for yourself to be like this/that » … in analytical tradition the next question is : but
who / what is that yourself ?
This question that maybe you have also asked yourself, sometimes in your life, which took me on a quest to explore different worlds / realms. I didn’t really find the answer in my psychology studies, allthough the self-awareness units in complementary trainings helped me to see ( Ego message in the background : « Stop boasting … » and my reply to it: « That’s your definition/view/interpretation – I’m just naming some facts about my life-journey« ) and understand / peel off some of the layers (remember the structure of an onion) that had developed as a means of protection and a tool for survival, as reaction / response to quite some experiences in different contexts that tore wounds of shame, anger, sadness, fear and an underground feeling of being lost within all his ( The inner critic whispering: « well you are only over-sensitive« )- interesting TED talk with Brene Brown’s on vulnerability https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability?
To illustrate let me give an example, how these layers or beliefs / mind-sets can develop as an adaptation to expectations, family and/or cultural norms. Well maybe this one talks more to females : like being a « good girl » – honestly already as child I knew how go at least some of my way, I had a lot more boys as friends and prefered things like playing football with them to playing with « puppets » – on my way I arrived at peeling some of the layers off ( the structure of an onion) or review some beliefs, thanks to fellow wanderers on this beautiful planet.
As those patterns are deeply rooted in the system (both in mind as in body, more later on that) and in daily life are showing like habits, the challenge is to keep going on the new track and get back to it after a distraction*, instead of by habit believing those inner voices, by being present enough to oneself to notice them and their luring. Do you know this situation ? Driving and then suddenly realising, *hey I didn’t want to drive direction of my work-place, I shoud have taken over there … « my car knows the way » or does it simple take the one that is most often used ?
‘We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make the world.’ Buddha
By the way modern neuro-science, describes « neuro-plasticity » in the brain. Neuro-plasticity means that allthough the old, very often used pathways of thoughts, are like neuronal highways in our brain/mind, it is possible to create new paths, which might become a firm road. And maybe with time some grass begins to grow on the less used former high-way.
I am deeply grateful to those fellow wanderers, who helped to navigate through the fogs of some of my darkest hours; some by having sowed their unconditional love in my heart when I was a child, some were professionals with trainings based on western scientific standards ( medical and psychological) others solicited more my creative expression or my longing for connecting again to « which is behind all » (a bit like the Self in C.G. Jung’s work but there is more to it), common to all of them was a free, trusting and encouraging mindset and an open heart …
Ahh yes, I met some of them in real-life, ie in person, some only by discussing online, some through their writings, stories and other creative expressions (books, quotes, photos) for example Clarissa Pinkola Estés « Women who run with the wolves ».
The answer to « who / what is that my self?
So as of now (23.12.2017) I still have no definite answer to my question « who / what is that Myself », as there are really too many beautiful, complex theories out there, for me to choose just one 😉
Thanks to the Dalaï Lama and the re-assurance he gave me with his attitude: of « No need to convert to (Tibetan) Buddhism, if that is not your path … you may pick freely what is suitable for you at this moment of your life .. may it serve you well« … – Ah yes you realized for sure that I prefer to write « free-wheeling », I share my thoughts as they come (well yes, afterwards I try to a bit of structure for your comfort of reading and hopefully catching my meaning).
With no tangible, definite answer to that « MySelf »question, I could now reinforce my « theoretical / analyzing researches »,
I took another path or maybe it’s like the strings forming a rope, the one I had not so much explored yet – except some work with a fabulous kiné (physiotherapist)-, integrate also the body in the work with people.
Yes psychotherapy, can help quite a lot, and there also integrative approaches now-a-days, but often centered on the use of spoken words or putting stuff into words …. well and then there are those experiences that are beyond words or because you think you do not have the well enough nuanced vocabulary / descriptions / metaphors for expressing them (well this might also be a modern western cultural expectation) … or there are simply things between heaven and earth that can not be put into words, ie treated and analyzed by the rational mind,
Now back to hose experiences beyond words. Allthough here I describe those related to stress-full life-experiences, please recall yourself there are also moments of pure awe ( this might be a view in nature, like looking out at the sea or on top of mountain, watching the landscape unfold, it can also be a singers voice touching you deep inside …).
When an animal is crossing a predator, it has basicaly 3 options (stress responses) : Fight, Flight or Freeze (mimicking to be dead is useful as most predators don’t go for dead meat).
If you face an experience which activates your stress responses this has an impact on the body. In the animal world (yes biologically the humans are part of the animals), a pattern of shaking off the blocked tension from a freeze response, has been observed. And after that the potential victim of a predator, continues its day just as before, even after a deeply impacting experience.
One example might be, when in an emergency situtation, ie an accident you react vey cool, handle the situation and once the rescue team has arrived, you begin shivering or maybe notice tears on your cheeks (which for the sake of the exemple might be seen as an adaptation of the stress response ‘Fight’ by taking action while emotions are put on hold and then after shaking off the tension).
And then there are often situations where humans do not have access to that shaking off that blocked energy, for example by crying out loud, or other forms of physical evacuation, so the energy as well as the memories / images of the event, are stuck somewhere « in the system ». And as life has to go on (« The show must go on.« ), the organism creates a layer to protect oneself from those often painful or fear-inducing memories. Yes, in this way life can go on, it’s an emergency survival-strategy. And there is a « small » ( <- slight understatement) difference between mere survival and feeling alive, living your life as freely as possible in this moment.
Living more freely, more connected to my felt sense of self and this includes the body
So, I made the experience for myself, with that open-hearted kiné. From that experience on I began take interest in different forms of body-work. Physio-therapist studies were on my « this is no viable option for me list ».
At that time a friend offered me a book on Shiatsu, yet I had still some other paths to explore and peel of some layers off the onion.
Different experiences which allowed me to explore the world of senses, of integrating my body in my « view of Myself » and also liberating some tensions blocked.
Then finally in 2014, I dared to register for the Basic-course (level 1) of the Shiatsu-training by Adela C.Garay, of the Iokai Shiatsu-shool.
And now I have come to put into practice
« Le chemin se construit en marchant » –
« Der Weg ist das Ziel » –
« The path unfolds when you take the steps »
and thus dared despite my fears ( tapping into my courage by transforming fear into action, or being afraid and doing it nevertheless) to give other fellow wanderers on this beautiful planet, the opportunity to find me here on the net.
I wish to contribute by Shiatsu or other methods to the growth of people who honor me with their trust, thus inspiring and encouraging them to take the next steps on their path.
If this talks to you and you feel my approach of Shiatsu and other methods could benefit your life-journey, feel free to use this opportunity to contact me (the form is below), so we can check if working together would fit.
Did I mention that I consider myself a creative, unconventional ( nowadays some would say innovative or disruptive) free spirit ? 😉
May you enjoy the song (video below on page) – maybe I will make that post, on resonance, vibrations and waves, as occurring in moments of connection from heart to heart, communication beyond words, energy & waves both common concepts to music and shiatsu, as well as scientific physics … or should I first write a post with my current statement :
Altruism is really virtuous when it includes yourself
if the song « Nothing else matters » by Metallica is not your cup of tea, I wish you something else which gives you a moment of time-out and speaks to your heart.
Greetings from the south of the tiny country
Let’s stay in touch,
if you’d like to discover some more of my musings or creative strolls ( photos, drawings,…) or inspirational quotes, or if you consider working with me, please leave me your mail here and I will get back to you.
I hope you appreciate surprises as I do, I will not send on predefined dates and surely not send on a dayly rhythm.
If you prefer social media, please feel free to add me on linked-in:
Some songs that resonate with me
Nothing Else Matters by Metallica (this song is not in heavy metal style)
and then also
An Englishman in NewYork by Sting
Quand on n’a que l’amour, Jacques Brel
Alors sans avoir rien
Que la force d’aimer
Nous aurons dans nos mains
Amis le monde entier
Yes, I know some people won’t listen to Jacques Brel, so here is a link to the text of « Quand on n’a que l’amour.« http://paroles2chansons.lemonde.fr/paroles-jacques-brel/paroles-quand-on-n-a-que-l-amour.html